Oh wow..wow wow wow
I was out of town on business all day today...talked to AS this morning (he was out of it all last night and not worth my time to try). Anyway, we talked this morning, he seemed lucid and once again sincere about stopping the stuipid choices and keeping his job. I talk to him this afternoon and he has borrowed his gf's car and is going to have a beer with his friend. This friend is in active Heroin addiction and AS claims he is going to talk to him about getting off the heroin and going to the methadone clinic. OOOOkkk...GF calls me a couple of hours later and asks me if I had talked to him because he was suppose to be back hours ago and isn't there yet. AS doesn't answer when I call naturally.
Long story very very short, I came home tonight from watching Survivor with my girlfriend (which made me remember how nice it is to be 'normal' and kinda sad coz up to last week AS would come with me and we had a great time together)...ok, so much for the short story...lol I look in his room, mostly because I want to make sure he isn't lying in there dead, and there is a #$$^# syringe on the table in his room...him passed out sitting up infront of it. Guys! My heart sank, but I didn't freak out like I would normally! This is huge...I picked up the syringe and stood there for a minute till he woke up and said "I guess this is Tim's?" (I already anticipated the lie he would tell)...and he says "YES! He was here earlier and left it here"... HUH???? I was so calm it still scares me...I just took it and said I will not live like this anymore, we will talk more tomorrow. I know he can't be spoken to with any kind of sense when he is like this, so I will wait and I hope this calmness lasts because the worse is yet to come for Mr. "I can live the way I want"...This ends here, I refuse to let my life be taken over by his addiction again....I'm kind of scared that I'm so calm right now....I am sitting here right now with that hated syringe sitting on the desk in front of me and have been carrying it around with me..Is that weird? He hasn't come down to confront or deny yet...probably passed back out, I guess I should go check... Did I mention that he is on methadone and has been lowering his dose? Down from 85 to 65, he told me this with pride a few days ago, now he is shooting up....