I understand what your saying. But too many times iI have heard how those oldtimer AA people really do not like addicts in their meetings. I know what the rules say. But if this is a fellowship and you are there for f2f interaction and to seek support and guidance from these very same people. How can you do that when they dont welcome you?
And sometimes will try and push you out. Thats some crap I dont need right now. I am not trying to pick through my recovery. And so I dont think I should be forced to pick through discrimination for being an addict in an alcoholics meeing.
I have tried AA. And I will admit, it wasnt too bad. I even knew someone there. A girl I use to take my smoke breaks with at one of my old jobs. I would never have guessed she was an alcoholic as she probably wouldnt have gessed I was an addict. That was a little weird. But it was all good because she was someone I hung out with at work.
But still. I feel like its trying to shove a square peg n a round hole.
I only have not even a week until I go for my interview. If all goes well I will be in sober living doing more meetings than I can handle. So I am safe at home, no vehicle, stuck in the middle of nowhere, no money and no drugs anywhere in this town that I know of. I know there is but I couldnt tell you where.
I appreciate all of your suggestions. But I really need to just gather myself for these next few days. I am already a nervous wreck from my family and also reflecting on why I am in this position to begin with. And preparing for this sober living thing is just addicng to it.
I can only take so much right now.