Alcohol wove itself into the very fabric of my life.
it became my decision maker.....my upper.......my downer.
it became my persona i wanted to project......when really i was a frighten little boy inside..
remove that overnight..........and life becomes uncomfortable........the real me exposed...
i had know idea how to manage my own life.......or manage me.
I Expected to become a functional human being overnight.......it is only booze right?....
for some of us we needed and wanted a program of recovery......for some of us life gets better pretty quickly without it....
some went to therapists.......some went to aa.........some went to church.
some went back to booze unable to cope without the bottle.
for me it took time........to grow a new skin.............to learn new skills.
learn to except that its OK to admit I'm a frighten little boy.
deflate my ego a bit and reveal the real me.