Hi NJ,
Welcome to SR.
One of the biggest problems we have as alcoholics is admitting there is a problem. I can assure you that continuing to drink will eradicate any doubt from your mind. So, then what? We can't expect others to force us to go to AA meetings, or sign up for a recovery program,we have to decide that we want to do it for ourselves. I encourage you to reach out and find whatever help is available to you in your vicinity, and welcome you to SR. The bottom line is what is what do you want?