I don't feel the same about relapse as I used to. I was so dramatic. If I slipped I figured I had to do it up right, I mean it was a big huge deal to start using again..right?
Now I see how silly that was, I mean, if I am driving and I get a bit distracted and a wheel drifts off the road, I don't say 'oh, hey, may as well speed up, crash through the guard rail and see how much damage I can do.." no, I just gently pull the wheel and get back on the road toward where I am going.
I do that now with my addictions too. Mess up, no biggie, tug the wheel back on the road. Mess us really big...pull over, get some water, grab a nap, pull out the map, reconfigure route and get going again. No more drama. no more making every little detour into an unplanned offroad adventure.
End up in a ditch? Call for help...don't set up camp and make the ditch my new home.
One of the big steps for me has been learning how to handle my stumbles as a sober person, rather than as an addict. My addict is all about drama, My sober person is all about taking care of business and movin on.