Originally Posted by
PandorasFate 
As a recovering alcoholic, did you find yourself latching on to the people who helped you, becoming kinder and thankful, or did you have a sense that you could manipulate them if you felt weak?
Hm... interesting question. Neither, I think. I appreciate those who attempted to guide me in the right direction, but I'm kind of a nice guy, drunk or sober.
And I was more of a lying drunk than a manipulating drunk.
If I get correctly what you are really getting at, however, I think my gut tells me that he is the latter, unfortunately. When you said his behavior is better when with his mother, it reminded me of a very manipulative ex of mine, who was all sweetness and light at her mom's house. But when we were alone, she was a totally different person.
And I think the bottom line is that he is going to do what he is going to do. For now, today, the focus should be on you. Let tomorrow take care of itself. If he gets sober and turns out to be prince charming, that's great. But I wouldn't count on it, and I certainly wouldn't spend any time worrying about that right now.
-Goat