It does get easier!! I think that feeling of being pissed at myself is what got me through initially (and the folks at SR of course!!). I wanted to beat alcohol, this is MY life and belongs to no one/nothing else. I think I was about 2 months without a drink when I stopped needing that anger, and could start learning about this new, sober way of living. Now what I mostly use to get by is gratitude, which I find more pleasant than the anger=) One day at a time, I'm glad you are still here.