Thinking about yourself is a hard thing to do for a lot of people. And I understand that you are scared. Especially if your husband comes home with a case. Maybe this will be the first instance when you really have to put yourself first....can you head out to a movie, or the mall or for a visit with one of the people you mentioned on your support list? You don't have to stay home and watch your husband drink. Take a walk, take a long bath with a good book and a bottle of sparkling water or a good cup of tea. Do whatever you need to do to stay sober. That's why I mentioned AA - I don't attend meetings anymore, due to distance and time constraints, but in very early sobriety, I found it very comforting to be with people who understood my struggle, rather than sitting at home resenting people who could drink "normally" (my husband) or even, insanely, envying people who were still in denial about their addiction (my brother).
You last post sounds very determined...keep it up!