Originally Posted by
myxomatosis 
i know im an alcoholic, but i feel its different for me,
There's a term for that... Terminal Uniqueness.
I felt that it was different for me too.... I am told by nearly everyone, that they felt that their case was special too. You and I are not so different. Many nights I would drink myself to stupor just to go to sleep, or rather, pass out.
Welcome to SR!! It's a real good place to start. Steve suggested reading the Big Book, I second that. You can get an analog version, hard or paperback, at an AA meeting. You'll be amazed.
There are other paths, that work very well for some people here, I am sure you already know that if you've been lurking.
If detox is a concern, your doctor may be able to help. It's kind of hard to wean yourself.
Keep posting!! Good to see you here...
Mark