Welcome Michael you have come to the right place. You will get alot of good advice here. I wish I would have done something about the red flags. You are ahead of the game in realizing you have a problem. That is the good side. The bad side is you are probably going to have to give up drinking. Your mind will probably tell you that you can moderate after awhile. I read and listened to what everyone hear has said. It seems like since you don't want to talk to anyone you probably don't want to go to AA. I am at 15 months sober and this site has been my recovery. You really do have to talk and listen to others who are going through the same thing as you even if it is only via internet. I am a 50 year old woman who didn't start my drinking career until my kids were adults. I'm still not sure if I am a true alcoholic but sometimes I drank like one so that is enough for me. good luck