Originally Posted by
xenodamus 
I just want to know that I'm not alone....that there are other people who feel like this...that there is hope for me. FML
You're not, and there is. There are millions of people who've gone through and are going through, over and over again, exactly what you described. They need you here.
Originally Posted by
xenodamus "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results". That's me.
Our behavior is as absurd and incomprehensible with respect to the first drink as that of an individual with a passion, say, for jay-walking. He gets a thrill out of skipping in front of fast-moving vehicles. He enjoys himself for a few years in spite of friendly warnings. Up to this point you would label him as a foolish chap having queer ideas of fun. Luck then deserts him and he is slightly injured several times in succession. You would expect him, if he were normal, to cut it out. Presently he is hit again and this time has a fractured skull. Within a week after leaving the hospital a fast-moving trolley car breaks his arm. He tells you he has decided to stop jay-walking for good, but in a few weeks he breaks both legs.
Again -- you are not alone.