I'm glad you found us, jiva. In spite of everything that's happened, it sounds as if you aren't bitter, but looking forward to the next phase of your life.
I got sober after 25 yrs. on the rollercoaster ride - so I know it's possible for you also. We'll be with you on your journey if you wish. All your terrible times can be just a dim memory one day - you have everything to look forward to.