see what I can do differently now.
That is one of the keys, not doing the exact same thing OVER and OVER again and expecting different results.
If I hit myself on the toe with a hammer and it hurts, should I hit myself in the toe with a hammer to see if it still hurts? I spent a lot of years trying to stay stopped my way and I always wound up drunk again, I never relapsed, I got drunk!!!
I had to become willing to do ANYTHING to stay sober, in my case as with many others it was the fellowship of AA and the program of AA that worked for me.