I am so sorry that happened to you. That is most frustrating. I have been to around 10 meetings and it really has been a mixed bag. At so many of them, I kept waiting for this abounding amount of love to be hurled at me, like I hear people sharing about both in the meetings and on this board. Unfortunately, that only happened to me once. Other times I had to fend off creepy men or try and talk to women who wouldn't talk back.
I guess to a large extent it is the luck of the draw and an issue of fit. For me, AA just has never, ever fit. And I have tried over and over— going to the same meeting that I liked, going to different meetings, etc. On top of it all the program itself never really worked for me. And ultimately that is okay. You can work a strong recovery without AA. And I think you can work a strong recovery without fellowship. Fellowship probably is a necessity for a lot of people and just doesn't work for some.
These are the two things that I have found really helpful and neither requires any sort of group:
1. The most: one-on-one therapy.
2. Mindfulness practice— meditation.
Those are just two other suggestions to jump start change. Reading also helped me a lot, getting involved in a new exercise program, etc.