Thanks everyone for your support.
Getting drunk is not the answer, so I put on a pot of coffee instead. I think I'm going through some real depression here, not quite sure what to make of it, but know it isn't fun to be in this state of mind, so I hope it passes soon. I know I need to be proactive, so I'm getting out tonight, maybe go to a meeting, (which I'm really fighting right now), or just go for a long drive to clear my head. With the condition my head is in, I may end up a couple states away, lol. See, I'm coming around already, so its not hopeless, just another hurdle to cross while finding my way.
The support here is indeed incredible. Thanks SR.