This might be the point where the next time he's going through the pain of sobering up, you call your local AA intergroup and request they send some guys on a 12th-step call. Make no mistake -- he has to want his sobriety for himself. But as for not being able to help him and just worrying about yourself, well, no -- because who is going to just sit around and watch a loved one die, and because getting some guys out is something you can do. Let him be the one to turn them away, two guys who were once in his exact same shoes, now recovered. You never know. The options are getting to be very few.
Chris