I guess I want to know whether or not I have a problem. I drink about 3 times a month, and each time, I have around 10 drinks. I usually regret drinking for about 4-5 days afterwards, and experience extreme amounts of anxiety and guilt. I often think I should stop, not just for myself, but for my family. I can't imagine the pain my parents would feel if they knew I was drinking like this - I confide in my sister, but there's a limit to how much support she can give me. I keep messing up. For all intents and purposes, I am successful - but I fear that alcohol is going to ruin everything I've worked so hard for. I usually feel really happy when I haven't been drinking - and then I start believing that I'm fine, and don't have a problem, and then I go drink too much again.
I guess I drink because I think it makes me more sociable, and likable - it makes me feel as though people enjoy my company - when in actuality, they're probably wondering why I always feel the need to get so drunk.