Wecome allstar, this is a great place to come for help, or just to try and figure out if you are an alcoholic. Your story sounds very similar to mine (and I'm sure to many, many others), I've binged for 25 + years (I just turned 43), and as ridiculous as it sounds I still wonder if I am an alcoholic...how crazy is that??? All I know right now is I enjoy being sober. I enjoy waking up Saturday morning without a hangover, I enjoy being able to think about other things besides how ****** I feel or how I am going to make it through work on Monday. Read as much as you can and learn all you can about alcoholism...only you can decide what is right for you...but you can learn a lot from those that have gone through it and are living successful sober lives. Good luck!! Oh, and NEOMARXIST great posts...I really resonated with them and found them very beneficial, thanks for sharing!