I've been through the wringer with my now 31 year old AD. I"ve been through denial, rage, pain, tried to bargain with her, tried to control her, enabled, thrown fits, broke down in uncontrollable sobs, lost sleep, gotten physically ill from the insanity of it all, you name it.
When she overdosed in front of her children and was rushed away in an amulance unresponsive, I really thought that might be her bottom.
How very wrong I was.
Just as I've had to hit a bottom in many areas of my life, I also had to hit a bottom with having an addicted child, and finally let go.
As a recovering addict myself, who was also married to an addict (now deceased), and in recovery as a codependent, I now realize that God has a plan for each and every one of us.
So many of the things that have happened to me in my life that I
thought were the worst things possible at the time turned out to be blessings in disguise.
The five years I was with my EXAH were filled with violence and rage. Fear permeated every corner of my life. I was beaten every day unless he was gone on one of his drug runs.
That marriage is what finally brought me to my knees in my own addictions, and today I am grateful for that.
When my ex-fiance walked out on me and my youngest daughter over 10 years ago, leaving me high and dry financially, and a screaming wailing mess on the floor, I finally hit my codependent bottom in relationships.
Today I am grateful for that experience.
How can I not have faith in a loving God, despite what my eyes
think they see?
I sleep well at night knowing I have place my daughter in God's loving hands.
:ghug2 :ghug2