Hey Faithfully, Sorry, I didn't realize you were in the U.K. There was a man here in the U.S. whose girlfriend would not come out of the bathroom for YEARS. I think FINALLY the man called 9-1-1 (emergency here in the States) and after he did, I believe the State's Attorney where he lived filed charges against him for failing to contact the authorities.
I'm not trying to scare you or anything; I just thought I would mention it because your situation brought it to mind for me. I have no idea whether or not you may be in a precarious legal situation but you may want to go ahead and just call car 86 and let the NURSE come and let HER decide what he needs. That way, at least you have done the proper thing in the eyes of the authorities. And heck! You might get some help taking care of him. That would provide some relief for you.
Please take care of yourself and perhaps get some help for YOU in taking care of your hubby. We at Sober Recovery are here to support you no matter what you decide. So keep on sharing!