GemStar

Hi, I'm new here. I believe I will overcome this problem relatively soon. Probably a lot of you do not believe this. I actually did it once before, when I was in my early 20's. I am now 30. Unlike a lot of alcoholics and drug users, I am a pretty authoritative and straight-forward guy. A lot of people even think I am mean. In that regard, I might be useful to you. I won't lie to you about your problems, or my own. I actually *have* considered several times becoming a police officer. And I could easily do it. I have no problem with argumentative people and even though I'm not a big guy, I am extremely strong for my weight, which is about 170, and I am a male.

So I am not on some huge mental trip about this, like I'm sure a lot of you, maybe most, are. I am deciding to quit drinking because of my negative words to family and friends recently while under the influence of alcohol. But I still, even when drinking, am able to remain a logical and authoritative person. The only, the ONLY reason I have not become a police officer is because I disagree with the United States' marijuana laws and in fact, this is the main avenue in which I became an alcoholic! Maybe that deserves a post in itself! This not a "taboo" topic! But I digress....

I was a regular pot smoker as a youngster and at age 19, I was arrested for posessing marijuana. At that age, thinking that drugs can actually make a person happy, I figured I would drink instead, since my probation officer wasn't testing me for alcohol. And so, that's how it began for me. I think alcohol is horrible and I think I would make an absolutely *great* police officer because I am sort of a drill-sergent type of guy by DNA. I'm a hard-nosed person you might not like.... but that trait can be a real grace in this life, sometimes.

So anyway....... I don't want to go on a tangent about law or politics. Alcohol is bad either way. But I will not become an officer and enforce ridiculous marijuana laws on 15 year old kids who smoke a joint behind the gym. They have enough to deal with already. But I do have some alcohol problems and today started an outpatient rehab. It is a good decision for me, the best I've made in 8 years probably.

I was hoping to not make this long because I myself hate reading really long posts but I hope you read this anyway. You should let *me* be your conselour because I will bust your A** without question! But I actually need to bust my own. So I hope I make some friends here. Hiya! I'm really freakin' crazy even WITHOUT alcohol so you can imagine how I eventually get with it!!! But I have absolutely no shame! I openly admit that I am crazy and a drunk!! Woohoo!!!!

But I also, joking aside, know it has sometimes been a serious problem for me, and probably for you. So..... let's crush this thing. It can be done-- I've done it before!! When you quit for a long period, you just can't ever do it again... That's where I failed. I quit in my lower 20's but I knew nothing about it. I just quit because I knew I needed to.... I didn't know you should never drink again if you quit. So anyway.... HI!!! I'm freakin' crazy! Even when I'm sober! Oh... I have ADHD!!! Maybe that's why I talk so much!!!!!!!!