Hi Mellane - We are SO glad you are here!! You won't believe how wonderful these people are! You'll find lots and lots of support here.
About your 'two fears'.... 1) It's probably true that the results might be a little better if he were self-motivated to get into rehab, but PLENTY of people go by being coerced and have a good result. If nothing else, they learn about the tools that are available to them later on when they truly ARE ready. It's a very good education no matter what. Also, once they get sober the therapy they get is all about looking at themselves in the mirror and breaking down the denial. It's all good, so don't worry too much about that now.
2) And same goes here... If you still want to leave after rehab, then so be it. But cross that bridge when you get to it and in these next 30 days you just focus on YOU: your needs, your healing, your desires, your responsibilities, your choices and your health. Go to Al-Anon and immediately read the book "Codependent No More".
I look forward to seeing you around!