Originally Posted by firestorm090

Hello SR and Sara,

I've found that people in all areas and in most settings will always find something wrong with what is. I played that tune for years too, someone could say, "Hey, did you see the new boat your neighbor just bought?" and I'd reply, "Yea sure, he's probably dealing drugs on the side." I could never relate to people just working hard, going home and living life as it is, and benefiting from a regular kind of life. Where's the excitement, the romance, sense of adventure? It has taken me years to finally see that the style of living I chose didn't have romance, excitement, or challenge, it contained heartbreak, misery and self-loathing underneath the false exterior front I presented to the world. I finally had to accept that I was not unique and surely was not "someone really special, I'm different, ya know, so my life is harder." We all put our pants on the same way. The hardest thing about getting better, and also the most rewarding, is that I have to rejoin the human race. I refuse to be like Tom Hanks on Castaway, because he eventually started having conversations with a soccer ball, of all things. What's up with that? Is that the end result of terminal uniqueness, if so, I'll pass. Take away all the booze and the drugs, and we're left with our own little selves, our own problems, fears, desires and frustrations of those desires, for we can't all run the world. Maybe it all starts by just cleaning up our side of the street and waving at our neighbors now and then. Maybe we need to learn that we share this world with a millions of others, some of which have undoubtedly experienced the same or quite similar experiences as we. Maybe we're not all that different after all. And that has nothing to do with holding hands, saying a prayer and talking about God, but then again, maybe it should, who am I to say I know better?