this is exactly one of the reasons why you people cant understand or help me... you all think that substance abuse is "the problem" and if we all hold hands and and pray and somehow manage to stay sober than everything will be alright... well my substance abuse is a symptom of my problems, and I'm not really sure what what those are. And if i dont understand it, than no one else can either. until i figure out whats really wrong with me it wont make any difference if i'm sober or not.
im not sure if that was on-topic or not, but i had to get it out