hey kirsty,
i'm on day 14 and feeling the same things as you. i'm so sad and mad and scared and feel so alone. i can't stop crying. before today i felt better - i was hopeful, positive, but now that i'm back to work in the 'real world' i'm finding it just feels like too much to freakin' bear. i know how you feel. i don't really have any words of wisdom at this point but i guess i just wanted to let you know that i really really know how you feel. i too just wanna drown out these emotions (cuz they feel so huge and like way too much to deal with - feel like i can't handle them) but i know where that will lead me, it will lead me to a bigger nightmare in the long run - so i won't drink. but damn it's hard.
hang in there. that's all i can say. know that it will pass. even if it feels like it won't. and let it out. i've been letting the tears fall and that's been good i think. our feelings have been drowned in alcohol all these years, of course it's gonna come out in a flood. just brace yourself, hang on... and of course, keep coming here, there's so much support and encouragement and people who totally get what you're going through, i know i do.
pancake