Sorry to have been absent. I made it a week, then had a moderate sized slip, got home, bf was incoherently drunk, freaked out, went and then drank a half pint of cheap Vodka, which mainly made me restless. No hangover or anything, but made me want more, luckily it was already past 2 AM, and too late. Now again on day two. We're trying to work as a team on this, it is hard to come home and see that, it tends to overwhelm me, on top of all the other stuff going on.
But I am trying. Tired, though, of being so damn poor, and these worries about the future....things do not look good, big cutbacks at work, furloughs, all kinds of crap. Being sober helps a bit, but things are just sliding so far out of control.......wish I had the means to get therapy, or there was somewhere to turn for help putting all these broken pieces back together, somebody, some place that would help, as I feel increasingly weak.