Denial is a tough one. IMO children need to believe they come from something good. Confidence builds on the belief that something about you is good. In an alcoholic home this is a just a recipe for disaster. You have parents acting like children with too much authority, and children sacrificing in the manner that makes sense to them in order to contribute to a more stable environment. That maybe if things finally get good, the drama will settle down and we can all finally relax and just feel good about ourselves. (Of course then adolescence hits and these children can't deny feeling their own needs any longer - hello depression or angsty rage!)
Yes! Indeed!
I believed that everything in my family was OK until one night when I was 13 years old. My dad was drunk and he and my mom were in the middle of one of their big doozy fights. My brother, who was only 7, was more than likely tuned out (he has some Lost Child characteristics).
I was in my room, and I said to myself, "Self, you are the sanest person in this family. That may not mean much, but it means something."
No one has proved me wrong yet. Brother does come close, though. :P