daisylady

So, my AH is going to rehab... impatient for the 3rd time. For some reason, I just am not that happy. The only thing I am happy about is that I don't have to deal with him for 30 days! Isn't that a horrible way to think??? He made all the calls and set everything up himself but I still feel like the only reason he is going is because he is afraid our marriage will be over if he doesn't go (not like we have much of a marriage right now anyway). I still feel like he has had NO CONSEQUENCES for his behavior. If he has had no consequences what will make him change?!?! He hasn't lost his job, his family, he has no financial difficulty and he has never had to pay for rehab himself. It is just nuts.

His Mom is once again stepping in to pay for rehab, this time over $8,000.00... She is only paying as long as he goes to counseling sessions with her after he gets out. I am sorry, but could someone tell me if it is a little strange that my husband is going to a therapist with his mother??? HE IS 30 YEARS OLD! For goodness sake, they are not married! It is his MOTHER! UGH!

Anyway, I am not sure if I want to stay married or not. I don't know if I am even in love with him anymore and I just want to MOVE ON with my life. There is just SO MUCH damage that has been done to our relationship and marriage. In the last five years he has been to treatment 4 times! I just am so hopeless. Why will this time will be any different??

I am planning on working on setting boundaries for when he gets out. I really don't want him living here and I think he thinks everything is going to be perfect and all roses when he gets out.

Anyway, I know I am bouncing around, I just have a whole bunch going on upstairs and really need to sort things out. I really am just looking forward to 30 days with no AH.

Thanks for listening/reading as always.

:praying

Daisy