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Old 08-31-2009, 02:02 PM
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Serenity Bound
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Home of the Ravens-MD
Posts: 1,316
do i visit-part 2

First let me thank everyone who gave me their insight.

Second let me ask that you bear with me, cause I need to get this all out.

After much struggle, even up to & including going inside & speaking to one of the counselors, I did visit. Against your insight and against that little voice inside me. What can I say, just like the addict I had to do it MY way.

First I was already angry with AD because she wanted to leave on friday, because she has one 10 min pho call, but doesn't call me (only if she needs me to bring her something), never sent me a letter.

Second I'm angry at her friend. He is putting his two cents where it doesnt belong. i.e., tells me if I want to see my grand-daughter#2, all I have to do is call her father.............I know I'm being stubborn but I called him 3 weeks ago asking how she was......he did not answer the phone nor did he call me back.

Her friend goes on & on about how he maybe found a place for AD to live,
how he's going to three new meetings a day and how AD would probably benefit from them. How he has all this info about 1/2 houses.

And this is all b/4 the visit. (the day b/4)

So, I go in, she says I didn't think you were coming, so I didn't take a shower, thought I'd bum it today. Says how friend told her I may not come, and that HE wanted time alone to talk with her.

After the first hour of family class, we have a break. Friend goes on & on & on, I'm not going to go into all the sh*t, however I was getting angrier and angrier.

One of the counselors walks over and as she does AD says "oh no, it's J"
well "J" says what's that all about. AD says oh I don't want you trying to tell my Mom how I should go into a 1/2 house. "J" responds, oh I don't think your mom needs my input, I think she has already made up her mind.

More bullsh*t from friend, then he says he is getting evicted from his place, and I said "well I guess you'll be looking for a place to live right along with AD. He just looks at me, and AD very nasty says, I thought I could come back home after rehab. I said NO, not til you have sufficient recovery time under your belt. She's really mad now, and says well she should just leave there then. I said I think I should leave now. And I did. b/4 I did, I looked at the friend and said do NOT call me.

b/4 I actually left the bldg (I was talking to a counselor) AD comes out and says, "C" I/m leaving. At that point I rushed out the door.

I was shaking when I left. Turned my phone off and prayed.

2 1/2 hours later, I called to see if she did indeed leave and she did.

Here is what I learned from this experience.

trust my instinct
trust SR's instinct
I can't stand this sh*t anymore.
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