Gracie, you're not following your analogies all the way through.
A person can take precautions against a cold. If they are successful they are not sick... at least from the cold. That doesn't make the people who didn't know there was a bug going around and forgot to wash their hands less sick. Mental illness is illness. It can kill as definitely as cancer and cripple the quality of a life like a physical paralysis. Not everyone raised by an alcoholic is mentally ill. For those that might be counted as such, the levels can vary. I have some bad habits. I've never been to a shrink but I would guess the worst one would say is I might be a little neurotic. But our experiences with our alcoholic parents differ greatly. I think you must realize that your post is likely to dismay the people here who have suffered not just neglect, but severe physical and emotional abuse at the hands of an alcoholic. Their damage cannot be boiled down to poor coping skills. Mine can. Yours, I'm supposing.
Dino doesn't like the word "addict". Therefore, I don't use it on him. I suppose it's the same as your not liking to be thought of as "sick". To him an addict is a street dwelling, theiving parasite. At one time those words would have described him but he still can't wrap the idea around himself. That's okay with me. He still started working on his life and that has included not using drugs. I don't care how he needs to think of it. I have read plenty of posts on the NA page where the writer says they could not have begun their recovery journey until they identified themself as "addict". People think differently.
Now I wish you would be specific about what your real complaint is. Something punched your button. Nobody has ever just called me sick. Nobody has suggested I have a big general unsolvable problem. Here, in every recovery book I have ever read and in every group I have attended I have been encouraged to examine the specifics of my life and to begin fixing specific problems. Copping out with a plea of general weakness has never been encouraged and I'm wondering what experience has prompted this post.
Way curious,
Smoke