There is some really excellent input on this thread.
Originally Posted by
gneiss 
I know it's my addiction talking and I know it's stupid. I know in my head I have lots of great reasons to stay clean. I just don't feel it. I don't feel the commitment I first felt.
That's the beauty of recovery...you don't have to "feel it" to do it.
If I only worked on my recovery while I was feeling the commitment I would have relapsed a long time ago. I only recently figured out that I cannot do this based upon how I feel. It's something I have to do no matter how I feel.
The only reason I have almost 3.5 months sober is because I stuck with it even when sticking with it was the last thing I wanted to do.
I thought that if I didn't feel the commitment, I must be doing something wrong. Nope. It happens...the negative feelings come and go.
I wasted six years being wasted. To me, that's a traumatic event...a life gone wrong.
I have no social life now...but I didn't have much of a social life while I was drinking, either.
Freepath said that "good lives take a long time to build." That's right on.