Okay, I’ll be the black sheep. One session of chastisement coming up. Let’s see…whips? Face slap? Ooooooo …spanking! Everybody take turns spanking californiapoppy!
Hey, I think relapse comes with the whole sobriety goal. Most people don’t succeed the first time out. But I think that you need to ask yourself some questions.
What was the reason that you thought it was acceptable to drink again? Does that reason still exist? Was it rationalization or was it hopelessness based upon real problems? Are you doing anything to address those problems? Would it matter to your sobriety if you tried and failed to address those problems?
Quitting drinking offers no assurance that your life will be any better. It only offers the assurance that you will be sober. Your life might get worse. It’s not a question of life definitely getting better because you quit drinking. That will not necessarily happen. You will get hungry, tired, thirsty, uptight, too hot, angry, lonely, and all of the other negative feelings and situations that life can bring. People will die, you may lose money, whatever.
Never underestimate the power of the first drink. You can lull yourself into a false sense of assurance that you are now a social or moderate drinker. You may very well succeed at being a social or moderate drinker, right up until you fall back into patterns of being unable to control when you drink or how much you drink.
I think you are definitely doing the right thing coming here seeking support and ideas. Unequivocally, you have both.