Alchemy isn't real...it doesn't work. If it could be found in powder-liquid-pill form, the world wouldn't be the place it is today...
Originally Posted by
siamcat 
Can I do what I must to become one with the source? Do I have it in me to release my demons so pointedly, direct with that python spitting intensity? Intentionally? INTENTIONALLY!?!?
(((Siam))) Personally, I really hope you don't. I like you Siam, and I would miss you if you were to do anything foolish...
Originally Posted by
siamcat What are the rules of madness? I want to unbecome. Unbecome with my source. Unbecome with my beautiful wounded eschaton...
There are other ways to unbecome, Siam. You are the only one keeping yourself from breaking with your past and moving forward. I don't want to sound like a broken record, but the past is over. There is absolutely nothing you or anyone else can do to make it different. But the future is still out there, Siam, for you to make of it what you will.
The problem with madness is that it has no rules. Please steer clear of it. Siam, if you really feel unable to control your impulses, call someone. Anyone. Right away. A real, live person you can talk to who can respond to what you are saying. I hope you are well, and I hope to hear from you soon.
Daisy