Originally Posted by
Katie09 
I guess this is the other side of the coin from what one reads in the friends and family forum. I often see the addict just getting crucified over there, as if we're subhuman and just don't care for others. In spite of my issues, I do have the ability to love. And even though I am very angry and sad in this moment, if there is someone out there better for him I wish him well.
I understand this Katie....alchoholics and adicts get alot of stereo typical things applied to them.
However, as you seem to understand, at this point it seems like it's time to leave.
I had a relationship with a man for over a year, and we cared a great deal for each other. However there were issues that he wasn't prepared for, some of my own problem areas also rose up glaringly...end result we split...and a month later he wanted to try again AND had a real attitutde of health...he had changed.
BUT for me I knew that he was changing for someone else...if we had gotten back together i am pretty sure he wouldn't have changed and i would have stayed stuck as well..instead we let go of our relationship and both of us grew and changed. He is now happily married to a very nice woman. And i am genuinely glad...I love him but in a different way and am pleased for him.
The alchoholics in my life are very capable of love and most of them don't even lie cheat and steal anymore than the average person....in or out of sobriety. Don't buy into the steriotypes cause then if you don't meet them you might start thinking you aren't an alchoholic and we cant have that
Anyhow that was my expereince for what it is worth...my heart goes out to you Katie I know how hard it is (hug)