I have been reading all the facilitator material. There is alot of stuff to go over.
I will have to invest a small amount of money to get materials that I need.
There is alot of support in starting a meeting in my area.
But I want to be sure I have at least a year of clean time first.
Its one thing to let myself down. Quite another to let others down.
So when I feel I have a good run of clean time and I know I can commit. I will take action in making it happen.
I just relapsed last week. So It will be a long time.
It has given me something to strive for tho.
Like a project.
I love doing stuff like that.
To give to others in such a big way.
I did a Lupus fundraiser in 2005 in my cousin's name who has Lupus.
We had a BBQ and money drop donations.
I paid for everything. But it all cost maybe $250 for materials.
We raised almost $1000 in 4 hrs.
I have never done anything so selfless in ym life. I will always remember the look on my cousins face when she saw us up there doin it.
It was surprise. We both just started crying. It was awesome.
The only real accomplishment I can be proud of.
I am capable of doin great things. But I let my addiction stand in my way.
I am tired of holding myself back.
I am ready to shine. Ready to show the world what I am about.
I really need to throw myself into recovery tho.
I am goin to do that now. I want it so bad.
Just the feeling of doing something to help others is amazing.
There are no words to describe it.
Anyway. When and if I get this going. I will def keep everyone updated.