Hopeful,
Just your username implies that you are, indeed, optimistic (at the very least) about your husband's recovery. However, it is your husband's recovery, which means he is entitled to go on his own journey, whatever relapses and experiences that may include. Any time someone you love or care about betrays your trust, you wrestle with so many emotions: insecurities from your own personal past with others (be it past lovers or friends and family members), you wonder if you'll ever be able to get past this current obstacle, and you recognize the warning signs of someone you blatantly disrespected you and endangered themself. What you need to do is really tune into ways of coping on your own as opposed to ways of coping strictly with your husband's addiction. Life throws curveballs, put on your game face and thinking hat and focus on your own journey. The more you can enjoy the process of life, the better your life will be.
Hugs & support,
Rach