Originally Posted by
Katie09 
All I know is he keeps me in line when I am around him. He is protective and comes down hard on me. For example, last night we went to the casino which I hate. I got so bored we agreed I could have ONE drink.
Katie,
He is neither protective nor coming down hard on you, nor keeping you in line. Obviously. And good for him. It's just not his job.
Over years of experience with trial and error, most of us have found that this kind of policing simply does not work. I won't get in to what a cluster that would bring to a romantic relationship. Let's stick to the experience that policing isn't effective.
Take it a step further and get locked up in a 30 day rehab. The relapse rates for those going to rehab are very high. So, even in a 'perfect' policing setting where alcohol is not available, you are learning tons, great support, most folks go back to drinking after holding their breath for a month.
Real recovery seems to be an inside job. A vast fundamental change in the person.