Hi everyone and thanks for your replies.
I did get to see my daughter (and my mom) on Mother's Day. AD was well behaved.
She even gave me a card that pictures a kitten who fell into a toilet bowl (can't make this stuff up) and it says "Well, that wasn't supposed to happen." Inside the card, it says, "Some of the best lessons moms just let you learn for yourself"
Than she said the card means she understands that I can't keep taking her to rehab if she won't stay there, and that she understands why I won't do that anymore.
Meanwhile, she informed me that she hasn't been back to the HIV clinic in 6 months, can't figure out how to fix the problem with losing her charity care there, and can I please help her???
Soooo - what I did was give her a couple of suggestions on how to fix this herself as she is almost out of HIV medication. If she shows some effort and tries to help herself, I MAY (or may not) help her further, as in take her to an appt at whatever agency or other needs to get involved..
Whatever. One nerve-wracking holiday at a time.
Thanks be to God I saw her, and Thanks be to God, its over for another year.