I think that if you put the prototypical codependent at the end of one scale and then the anti-codie at another it is certainly true that a large number of people end up very close to the prototype. Giving a name to my issues has certainly helped me so if it helps others why not? Do I agree with it's existence? Sure. But I do have a certain problem and I mean no offense here, in fact this might be more about me, because in a way, while I have some codie qualities I am sort of the anti-codependent, fiercely independent. So here is my story:
I went to a 12-step/buddhism talk the other night and at one point the speaker went around the room and asked some people to call out what their addictions were. One lady called out, "My name is ______, and I'm CoDa" or something along those lines. Instantly, I noticed this anger rushing through me. I was pissed that being "addicted to love" was being lumped into being addicted to alcohol, drugs, and the like. I felt that I had worked hard as hell to beat this animal and I was like, really? I wish I was addicted to love, give me a break. Where does it end? What else can I be addicted to and create a whole cult around? In a way it was like let's create a whole little drama around this.
So two things. One, maybe this is a reflection on me. I also went to an Al-Anon meeting once and had a similar annoyed feeling towards the energy there, like get over it people, come on. So I just am unable to as of yet empathize. Hopefully, one day I will get there. Two, I do not think that codependency is an addiction and should be treated in the same way as alcoholism or substance abuse. I suppose if twelve step helps for it, ok, do your thing, but are there dangers to treating everything as an addiction?