Lots of good advice here, TSH....just want to add...Please keep in mind that at 'anniversaries' some people use it as a time to relapse. Could this be some of the problem?
Also, I know you bought a lot of books on alcoholism....get them out again. Reread.
I wish I could make you feel better. Working through this, is going to make you stronger. You've got it. Breathe.