Where do they get it?
That lovely sense of total entitlement...that refusal to hear "no." My exabf, as I've shared before, is desperate to get ahold of me. He has called about a dozen times this week with increasingly desperate messages. I learned on here that answering even one time encourages more calls, so I ignored it. So eventually, he figured out to call from an unfamiliar number. I am in contact with the public on this phone for work and am expected to take calls, so if I don't know who it is, I assume it's for work, as I did today. But it was him. He never ceases to amaze me. Was I blind, deaf, and dumb????
Here's what he said when I asked "What is it you want?"
"I want so-and-so's number, who I know is in your new home group." (which I just joined 2 weeks ago, months after our break up. Odd how he even knows that! Stalker behavior). I then told him I don't give out others' numbers.
"Then can you help me", he said. He wanted me to help him figure out a computer problem, which was "desperate." I said "No, I don't do that kind of stuff."
He then said "Why are you being so snappish with me? I am not doing anything mean to you? Why are you so mean to me now?" He said "You have to at least be civil and help me. I'm just asking you for a favor, after all!"
I then explained "I am not available to you for "favors" any more. I don't have anything else for you. I am done with helping you."
He said "I can't believe you are just saying you are not going to help me. I need you to help me. Are you really that mean you can just say "no" to me like that? You are supposed to be there to help your fellow addicts. You are a nice person, aren't you? Nice people like you help others."
He literally was incredulous that I really wouldn't help him with anything, because always before, I just wouldn't answer and/or turned away from him when I saw him in meetings. I never actually explained that I am never going to help him any more. He couldn't believe that someone actually said "NO!" to King Baby! I don't know if he has ever heard a flat out NO from a former enabler in his life.
Hopefully that is the end of that. I don't know why, exactly, but these phone calls, even though I never answered any of them for weeks except this one, really bother and kind of scare me. I don't know why. There hasn't been any threat made, it just feels way off. I'm afraid that he will have some type of temper tantrum and do something to me for denying him help.
KJ
:wtf2