Hugs, Glenna. Try to live in Today, but be ready for any kind of Tomorrow.
Ever meet someone who is a super-long-term martial arts person? They can't know if they're going to turn a corner some day and encounter someone who's bigger and fiercer and meaner than they are.....but they DO know they can handle it when it comes, so they often walk with an air of grace and courage that I'm jealous of.
The ultimate goal for me is to become strong, wise, and calm enough to know that I can and will be happy no matter what happens or what someone else chooses. The stress lifts, as I've no longer got everything invested in one outcome. Al-Anon was SO helpful to me in this, as was counseling and, yes, martial arts training
