Your ABF sounds like my AH -- even though he has had all the experiences he has had (dui's, jail, financial problems, blackouts etc) he is still in denial that he has a problem. That was definitely a deal breaker for me -- he can't even admit it so I'm wasting no more time to only be handed the same old same old for the rest of my life.
I'm so glad that you're out of the situation Naive and have some time to rest, visit with your loved ones, have some peace and to work on yourself.
Laurie