Kj as parents that would like to have a second chance to
change our own children- advice is offered not as criticism as we have already lost the child that once was and have to deal with the child that is. I myself do not like the results of my actions that produced the son that I have now because I also thought it was a growing stage and was lenient and brushed it off.. If only I could go back to where you are now with a 14 year old and be the strength of consequences I wouldn't be here at all.
I do not take responsibility for his addiction that did start with cigarettes then to pot then to crack but I do take responsibility for looking the other way when I should have been aggressive as a parent rather than trying to be enabling..
My son will be 24 this summer..it has been a long 10 years , so to go back to the first incident and take a stand as a parent would be a gift..
Be as hard on her as she can handle at this age and she may think about other actions first before she leaps...
lauren