Here's some random musings I posted on my Facebook the other day. My cousin told me, "This is soooo long, and soooo worth it." I cut a couple things out; hope it amuses you a bit. Hang in there Bam.
A couple of weeks ago members of a church in town left a tract on my car windshield. It happened to be one of those fake $20 bills. It's folded and at first glance it looks like a bill folded in quarters. When you open it up, it is half the length of a bill and it asks if you are disappointed that it wasn't a real bill, and then states you should find God if you were disappointed and heavily implies you will go to Hell if you do not. The church's name, logo, and address were stamped on the back.
In the past months I have had a few experiences that have made me look for strength, both within myself and elsewhere. My best friend came through in fine style, and I will always be grateful for that, whether we stay friends or not (and I most definitely would like to remain friends). But in my quest I ran into a person who has infinite faith in God. I used to believe in God, I was of average religiosity. But people change, times change, and I found that the idea of God no longer really cut it for me. I became agnostic, and when I finally quit fighting it I found I was much happier because I was not trying to force myself to believe something that really did not make sense to me (I won't even discuss how I feel as this pertains to calculus, especially since my calc 2 professor would do half a problem on the board, announce a miracle had occurred, and scribble out the answer. No wonder I had to take it twice. I digress). Even so, this person's faith is somewhat inspiring, in a weird way. Occasionally it makes me wish I could believe. But I can't. (S)he tells me everything happens for a reason.
As I was driving around town the other day I noticed some people out by the road asking for donations. Not "Will Work For Food" types, but people from a church asking for money. I wondered why these people did not ask their own church members for donations, especially since the signs they held had no obvious cause to support. As far as I could tell they just wanted money to support their church. As traffic inched forward at the traffic light I realized it was the same church that had left a fake $20 note on my car a couple weeks earlier. Why exactly should I give these people money? They had enough money to purchase tracts to put on cars, clearly they weren't that bad off. I opened a storage compartment on my car and found the tract exactly where I had left it. I folded it in half, rolled down the window, and offered it to the lady taking donations. "I hope you aren't disappointed," I said with a smile as she took the tract. I rolled up the window and glanced up just long enough to catch the glare. I have cleaned out my car twice since that tract was left, I have no idea why I did not throw it away.
Maybe everything does happen for a reason.