Why does the addict push those that love them away?
Hello after viewing this site for the last 6 months i have finally registered! So let me start by saying i way a drug addict 17 years ago and hit rock bottom before i quit. Now i am in love with someone whom i meet (we have only been dating 6 months) while they were drinking and did not know, and yes i should have seen the signs but they are a hide and drink type so i never really saw it. So they came clean and told me they had a problem and entered treatment and i promised to stand by them no matter what and during in-patient we got even closer and now they are home and doing out-patient and 90 in 90 which i still support. A week ago this person lapsed and i was there to help and gave some tough love after they asked for my help, when we are together we are both very happy but when apart this person changes and gets very negative but i know that recovery is up and down so i stay supportive!
Now we had a great time Thursday and then Friday & Saturday they dropped out of site no answering calls or messages and i was really worried so i went to there house today to check on them and was greeted with great hostility and told this is not working and we cannot be together! Now i know it is not recommended to get into a new relationship during recovery but if your relationship started before and it is a benefit then i think it is a plus to have lots of folks around you that care about you.
I believe i am being pushed away because this person is scared and do not know what to do, i new they would be angry that i went to see they were ok but never expected this at all..