I believe him everytime he says he trying to give up only to be lied to, manipulated, bled financially, physically and emotionally dry and abused. I'm sick of living like this I need some peace. I think if I detached it would be better??? I had been attending alanon until my bedrest and this was helpful, but I still can't master detachment.
((((hugs)))) Have you read through the stickies at the top of our forum here? I found when I was asking these questions, reading those things helped me a lot.
Also, detachment is how to emotionally let go of feeling responsible for someone else's actions. However, emotional freedom will not help with the physical issues: "being bled financially, physically". Even if you detach emotionally, he will still lie to you and he will still use manipulation tactics. If he's anything like my SAH (S=sober), when you detach (don't let his manipulations and lies cause you to react) he will become MORE agressive with his verbal/emotional/mental abuse on you. The crazymaking will come out in full force.
In my personal experience, the only way to "detach" from all of that is to separate yourself physically from him. I chose to go "No Contact" with him for two months. Even that he refused to respect and would text me, call me, email me, and show up at my door to try to get me back into crazymaking conversations.
I do hope that you will have better luck in your situation... but please, whatever happens - LOVE YOURSELF FIRST. Take care of you MOST. You and your unborn baby need to be safe and loved (regardless of what your bf does). Keep posting here, and since you are bedridden, I would strongly suggest reading some good books. The first two I recommend for you (they helped me work through things TREMENDOUSLY) are "Codependent No More" by Melodie Beattie and "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft.
(((((hugs))))) JustMe