heartandhome, I feel for both you & your AD. My RAD has found AA meetings to be more helpful to her than NA. Perhaps your daughter can try those. I've seen the depression, and can honestly say I KNOW how you feel, Especially when they are trying to do the right thing. I also know how it is when my H would continually be on my RAD's back. Never believed she was clean, didn't believe in her going to rehab, because it didn't work b/4. I told him that I had hope. She has it doubly hard because her H didn't want her to go to rehab either. And he still doesn't get it that she goes to so many meetings.
I don't know where you live, in my RAD's case she was lucky enough to get into rehab within the same week that she called. I don't know if it was with the help of some of her program friends or not. We also have a "crisis" phone # that she could call, and did.
Recovery is difficult. I am praying that your AD gets the help she needs.
Hugs,
Chris