I completely and totally understand what you're saying. I've been doing the same thing. I'm still dealing with my abf's addiction issues, but have recently decided to do more for myself. More FUN stuff!!! I went to a comedy club with my friends this past weekend and think it is the BEST therapy in the whole world. I haven't laughed and had fun like that in a really long time. I was also keeping myself from doing anything and getting caught up in the chaos. I feel like a real person again and am re-finding myself. Congrats imallright for making really good choices for yourself!