I found it took some time for me to disentangle myself from the mess. For awhile, my focus was on him - what he was doing, what he wasn't doing, what he might be doing. And then, slowly I was able to make a switch. I spent more time thinking about me: what I wanted my life to look like. I had learned those 3 C's ~ I didn't cause it, I can't control it and I can't cure it... once I was away from him for awhile and the dust settled... I was able to start learning more about me. I learned how much I had neglected myself in the time I was with him. It was fun to get to know me again. What movies did I like? what restaurants did I want to try out? What new things could I try that I had not had the courage to do before?
You have the gift of time right now, and some peace and perhaps not so much drama as you had before. Perhaps now is the time to do some things for yourself!
Hugs
Cats